Friday, February 27, 2009

Christian Marriage Counseling Getting God Inspired Guidance


Christian marriage counseling is used by many couples striving to follow God's will and seek His guidance when the need for marriage counseling has come. When you marriage is struggling it is important for couples to get good advice from marriage counselors. If you are Christians then it very well may be that you need to get marriage counseling from someone coming from the same place.

The problems that you have in your marriage may be an inability to relate to each other for some reason. It could be due to more serious problems such as adultery, pornography, lying, or many other things. Whatever the reason, it is incredibly important that you seek a counselor to help you help the marriage.

The advice that you may get from secular marriage counselors may be good but also may not give you guidance that comes from God's word. There are many counseling choices available to you that can turn to before your marriage ends up in divorce. The best way for many to avoid that has been Christian marriage counseling.

Many churches now have marriage & family counselors on staff and may also have a counseling center. They are able to provide many types of counseling services but are of great help in family therapy and Christian marriage counseling. They will not just try and help you solve problems in your marriage but will be able to help make your marriage stronger and draw you closer to God.

A good Christian marriage counseling program will have a counselor that will draw you and your spouse back together and will help draw you closer to God, together. It will help you get your priorities back in line so that the two of you will be able to focus on things that are more important.

It is really important that you do not hesitate to find help if you are having problems. The longer you wait, the harder it will be to fix the problems. This is no time to be in denial. You need to get things back on track and Christian marriage counseling can help you accomplish that.

The hardest thing that you may have to face is trying to convince the one you love that getting counseling is important. It may be necessary to go and seek advice from a counselor on the best way to get your loved one to go in for counseling.

There is a lot to risk either way. There may be some things uncovered that will be uncomfortable to talk about but facing those issues and addressing them has to be done. You will also have to learn a lot of humility as you may find out that you are the source of some of the problems. You may also find out that there is very little that can be done to save the relationship but still you will have done everything you can to save it.

If your marriage is important to you and you are trying to have a Christian family, then finding a Christian marriage counseling program is of the utmost importance.

Game On How To Get Ex Back


How to win ex back? Get the game on. Not to take the situation lightly but it is a competition. It is a game, just an incredibly important game.

There is a former head coach for the NFL team the N.Y. Jets who said something incredibly memorable after a big loss one Sunday. “This is what's great about sports. This is what the greatest thing about sports is. You play to win the game. Hello? You play to win the game. You don't play it to just play it. That's the great thing about sports: you play to win, and I don't care if you don't have any wins. You go play to win. When you start tellin' me it doesn't matter, then retire. Get out! 'Cause it matters.”

Right now may be the most important game of your life. The results could have a direct impact on the rest of your life. This is something that is supposed to be taken seriously. It is something that you have to believe you can do. It is something that you have to try and do. How to win ex back is to put everything in and hold nothing back. How to win your ex back is to play to win the game.

Is getting back with your ex really important to you? How much thought have you put into this? How much time have you spent looking at yourself and trying to improve areas that may have caused problems? The truth is, you will never know how to win back ex unless you decide that it is the top priority in your life. Treat it as the most important thing in your life and chances are you will have a greater chance of success.

When you are seeking relationship advice and are asking, “how to win back ex” the advice you get won't matter unless you believe that this is something you can do. If you want that romance to return, you have to believe that you can do it. Why even bother playing if you you don't believe that you can win ex back? You have to have confidence in not only your ability to do this but you have to believe that you deserve this. Believe in yourself and you will soon find out how to win ex back.

If your ex girlfriend or ex boyfriend is worth the effort then you have to put some effort in trying to get them back. You want to know how to win ex back? Play the game! Don't just sit around thinking about it? Do something! All the greatest ideas in the world is meaningless unless they are put into practice. It is true that knowing is half the battle but no game or battle half fought has ever been won. You want to get your ex back, you are going to have to do something about it.

The real way how to win ex back is to just jump right in and give it everything you got. What ever strategy you employ, don't mess around. Take it seriously and put 100% in. If you know what it is that your ex wants then hold nothing back. Meet their needs. Find out what it is that you have to do and put everything into it.

Getting back with your ex is a huge challenge but it is something that you can do. Just make sure that you treat this as the important thing that it is. If you learn how to take it seriously and really play to win the game then you may have just found out how to win ex back.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Fight Back - How To Win Love Back



How to win love back has been the plight of many who have loved and lost. You may be feeling that it wasn't time for the love to end. If it was a failed marriage or relationship of some kind you may want to try it again. The love that was once there for some reason is gone or is nearly gone. If you aren't ready to let it die and disappear, then you want to know how to win love back.

If you look at love as a war that is constantly being waged then you will understand how easy it can be to lose battles. Things can turn on a dime and while you may have been winning battles left and right you may have seen the tide turn on you. Where it looked like you were winning the war it now looks like it might be lost.

If you aren't ready to give up and admit defeat then FIGHT! If what you are fighting for is worth all the tears that have likely been spilled then by all means try to find some means how to win love back. Winning love back is a hard fight but it can be done. The war should only continue to be fought if it is truly worth it. Take a step back and look at the situation. Make absolutely sure that this is what is best for both of you. If it isn't then it may be best to cut your losses.

When trying to find out how to win love back, you will also want to try and find ways to improve on what you are doing and what you have been doing. Any war that is fought, people have to be able to better themselves if they want to win. Look at what has happened in the past that you have done. Are there things that you could have done differently? Try to find out what those things are. The one you love isn't going to want to go back to the way things were if that wasn't a good situation. Change what you can to be the one you love wants.

Also try to get advice and ask relationship advice on how to win lover back. Any fight takes a strategy and if you are lacking there and need help then you need to get relationship advice. Get someone to help you find out how to fight this war better and win lover back. Also get them to help you find out how to be better lover and a better friend. Those are the keys to getting a better relationship. This is what you are going to have to know when you want to know how to win love back.

You don't want to win love back just so you can lose it again. You want to make sure that what you are trying to bring back together is going to be stronger than ever. You will have to make sure that you are a better person and well worth the risk. You have to learn how to fight and what will make you a better love warrior. Fight for keeps, though, because you want to learn how to win love back for good.

Want Your Ex Back? A Lesson From Being Robbed At Gunpoint!



After your initial contact...you want to set up your
"1st Date" again.

AND...the MOST important part, the secret and
the part nobody else but T Dub will tell ya :-)...is the date HAS
to be EMOTIONALLY CHARGED.

Okay?

That DOES NOT mean 'dinner and a movie'.

because...well...it's BORING...and does not
create a bonding...or in our case a RE-bonding
experience.

In fact, you want to pack in several emotionally
charged mini-dates in a span of a couple hours.

Why?

If you just do 'dinner and a movie' you lose
out on a Sociologically PROVEN principle...

emotionally charged experiences = bond

Look at it in another way.

Last time you went to the bank, do you
remember the person in line in front of you?

Behind you?

Probably not. Me either.

But...

What if while you were in the bank, it
was ROBBED AT GUNPOINT?

and the robbers couldn't get the safe open. The
robbers are livid, screaming and waving huge guns
around. The tension feels so thick you could
cut through it with a knife.

You are lying face down on the cold bank floor
and can see your breath fogging up the tile below.

You are trembling...because it is eerily silent
for a moment.

"Oh my god!"

"Where are the robbers?"

"Are they behind me?"

"Are they watching me?"

So you slowly move your eyes around and
see a sweet older lady lying right next to you.

She looks a little like Grandma, and you come
out of your own haze enough to realize that she
is even more terrified than you. She is softly sobbing.

You slowly reach out and take her hand in yours
and give her a little squeeze that says..."it's gonna
be all right."

NOW!

Let me ask?

Are you going to EVER forget that older lady?

and...

Do you think she will EVER forget you?

Not in a million Sundays!

Now...I'm not saying to go rob a bank on
your first date! LOL.

But you want to go on an EMOTIONALLY
charged and exciting date...and preferably several
mini-dates in a span of a couple hours.

A short roller coaster ride is one GREAT example.

T Dub teaches you more about things like emotionally
charged dates in the Magic Of Making Up System.

Check it out here

You'll also discover psychological tactics and techniques
you can use to get you BACK on that first date with your
ex again.

Check it out and then decide if it's what you need.......

PS: Get a special unannounced bonus called 'Mind Magic'
when you reserve your copy of the Magic Of Making Up
System through this special link:

The Magic of Making Up System

Monday, February 23, 2009

To Get Lover Back - Show Some Tenderness


There are several ways to get lover back. You may have to try a little tenderness if the relationship ended with an explosion. Maybe the end of the marriage or the relationship resulted in a lot of hurt feelings and fights that resulted in some emotional pain. It could be there was something tragic that happened that caused the breakup. There may have been some wrong committed that caused humiliation for either party. Whatever the case, feelings were and probably still are hurt and if you want to get lover back, you will have to work gently and try to help heal the wounds that are there.

To get lover back you may have to take a close look at both yourself and them. There may be some things about you and the way that you are likely to handle the situation that could make matters worse. It could be things that you don't realize. There could also be some things that the one you love are struggling with that may have made them a little fragile. Even though they may not seem like big deals to you, for some reason they are to them.

Before you make any attempts at reconciliation, take a good look at yourself. It may mean that you have to go seek not only relationship advice but trying to get help on finding areas for improvement that you have. You have to be open to criticisms and accept that they may be right. You have to ask someone, “What are the best things for me to work on so that I can get ex back?” Be ready for any reaction you might get. Will it bother you to hear those things? Maybe, but it will do you good and will help you to get lover back. Take the advice seriously and learn to be more sensitive.

Whatever the person you love may be feeling, it is real to them. Understand that they have something that is deeply troubling them and come to them softly and tenderly. When they get upset, don't react. Fighting back or getting emotional won't do anything to help you get ex back. It will only drive you apart. You have to learn how to nurture them and help them heal. You will also have to give them the time and space that they need. The tenderest touch that someone can get isn't physical at all. It comes with a sense that you understand and that you are there for them.

There is a time for knocking some sense into someone but there is also a time for showing some tenderness and compassion. Know when those moments are and try to find the best way to act in them. True love will often require you to act and respond to things that don't seem natural to you. If the relationship is important, you will make those adjustments. Tenderness may not come to you naturally but one way or another, you will probably have to learn how if you want to get lover back.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Unhappy Relationship - Three Things You Can Do

Unhappy relationships are an inevitable part of romance, and their causes are numerous. Sometimes, a commitment is made and that once made, it can be hard to leave an unhappy situation. You may feel that you have to stay in order to support your loved ones, that you are unable to leave for any number of reasons. You find that you are making a number of excuses to stay in a situation that is not good for you.

If you are facing an unhappy relationship, then there are three things you need to do. Firstly, you can do nothing and maintain things just as they are. You will continue on your path of misery, those around you will become miserable, and you will continue along this path until you are in the worst of situations. So why does this situation occur? It is the simplest thing to do. It is easy to not do anything about the situation, and very hard to turn a bad partnership or unhappy relationship around. While it may seem noble, it is a bad decision to try and stay.

Out of the three, the other option which involves staying in the relationship is to fix things. This step requires a full commitment, anything less is as bad, if not worse, than trying to stick things out. This step requires that your partner is also committed in full to repair of the situation. This is the most challenging of the situations, but can lead to the best situation. Any changes made here will be lasting and permanent. If your partner is not committed towards the repair of the unhappy relationship, then all attempts to repair things will fail.

The last possibility is to leave. This is also very hard since people will make excuses in order to stay. Sometimes, however, it is a matter of ending the relationship before things become irreparable. Unhappiness, fighting, depression, and many other factors eventually come out of an unhappy relationship. This will not only bring you and your loved ones great suffering, but it will also negatively affect those around you are well. You have to overcome everything that is holding you back and take that first step towards resolving the matter.

If you need one, you should seek out the aide from a therapist or a coach. Mental hindrances in an unhappy relationship can be taken care of with the help of a therapist. If you need to work strategies for repairing your situation, then you should instead get a coach, someone who will work with you to develop strategies and get the success you need.

An unhappy relationship will mean one of three possibilities. You will either stay or suffer, you will repair things with your ex, or you will move out and move on. Therapists and coaches provide technical support while your family and friends will provide you with the support network you need

Friday, February 20, 2009

Ways To Get Back With Ex - Case Study On How To Get Back To Ex

Here's a video on how to get back to ex that reveals an actual case study.

Surviving A Breakup-Difficult But Doable

A breakup is certainly difficult to deal with, and it is hard on both you and your ex. There are a whole lot of mixed feelings, hurt emotions and surviving a break up involves a great deal of strength. It may seem daunting initially, especially with the void in your chest. It is not easy to fill that void, it is painful and difficult to handle. However, you should remember that you are not the first couple to go through a break up and you certainly will not be the last. You should find solace in the fact that you and your partner will move forward and survive this break up.

There are several ways to get back with ex by surviving a breakup. The first step is to not bottle up the pain. The fact of life is that no person can go through life without pain. Breaking up with a loved one is as emotionally hurting as the death of one. At that point, it feels like life has come to an end and you don’t know how to live without that person. You should know that it will hurt and it is alright to break down and cry. You should do everything possible to let the pain out as only then, you can think of moving on.

Once you start feeling calm, you can evaluate things and look at where you and your partner stand in the relationship. Understanding where you exactly are will help you move in the right direction. Many a time, you will realize that there is nothing left to your relationship and it is over. This is something you and your ex will have to come to terms with. Once you come to terms with this knowledge, you can take the next step.

Once you’ve made the decision to move on, both you and your ex need to remove the overlaps in your lives. This includes settling the property that has been exchanged and left at the other’s home. This will help ensure that no emotional landmines are left behind to trouble you both later in your lives.

This is the time, you should take all the support available to you. This can be from family, friends or others that can form an emotional support network for you and with whom you are totally comfortable and close. Even thought you’ve separated and are ready to move on, there is bound to be a lot of emotional turbulence. As a result, you will need as much help as you can get for surviving a break up.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Ways To Get Back With Ex: The Magic Of Making Up


It is human nature is to crave for something we can’t have. This applies more for relationships.

Any relationship where the chemistry is not kept alive is nothing but a one way street to disaster. This keeps happening until the bubble burst with either one of the partners saying they can’t take it anymore and want to break-up. This is when realization dawns and the urgency is discovered by the spurned partner and then starts the race to get back with ex.

The problem here is that couples tend to get into a sort of comfort zone in a relationship and forget what is required of each of them. Many a time, it takes a jolt to wake them up – it takes being dumped to understand the value of what they’ve lost.

Better late than never. If you happened to be dumped, don’t despair, as there are ways to get back with ex – with the magic of making up.

If you haven’t already heard of this controversial book on how to get your ex back, the Magic of Making Up is written by T.W. Jackson, who provides a series of techniques that can be adoped by spurned lovers to get back with their ex.

One such controversial technique from the book involves the dumped person actually doing nothing other than agreeing that separation is the best thing in the circumstances. In fact, the author says to walk away after saying that we’re also thinking the same thing.

The fact is they’re not actually walking away. What they are in fact doing is positioning themselves in a higher place and turning this bad scenario in their favour.

This is what we were talking earlier – wanting what we can’t have. This affects both the partners in the relationship. The person dumbed is confronted with a situation where they stand to lose the person they love, but they cannot let that happen. By keeping their head high and by using the above mentioned tactic, this person is able to make the other person feel a sense of loss by declaring it’s best to separate.

Do you now understand where we are heading? In the given scenario, there are two reactions you can expect. One is that of anger from the other partner who “dumped” and their ego is hurt by your response or the dumper could suddenly gain immense respect for the person they dumped because they didn’t get the reaction they expected.

T.W. Jackson is different from the other so-called relationship experts and he certainly didn’t endear himself to them because of his unique techniques revealed in The Magic Of Making Up but the good news is that they aren’t the same old techniques taught by everyone else.

According to Jackson, he doesn’t have to worry about endearing himself to the majority as he has testimonials from people who have implemented his ways to get back with ex and succeeded. He says, people need to have the strength of their convictions to maintain the required composure all through and after being “executed.”

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

4 Steps To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back!

If your girlfriend broke up with you but you want to get your ex girlfriend back, here are some very useful tips. Frankly, most of the times, this happens because you did something that is not acceptable. I know, as a man, it’s tough to accept this, but this is a fact.

Men often find it touch maintaining relationships with women, but understanding a little about women will get you going in the right direction. It is never too late, you just need to see where you went off track so that you come back right on track and get your ex girlfriend back.

Where did you go wrong?
Why did your ex girlfriend break up with you?

If you want to get your ex girlfriend back, you will have to consider these questions. There are girls that tell you all your mistakes, but there are many that don’t. You can even ask your ex girlfriend where you went wrong. There is nothing wrong in that. This can be a huge step that will help you get your ex girlfriend back. This will let you know what she thinks the problem with you is.

If you are not getting any help from your girlfriend and she’s not telling you anything, then consider the following steps:

Pay more attention - It could be that she was upset about you not paying attention to her. Women like all the attention they can get and may not always voice this need. This is certainly not an unreasonable request. Any relationship requires that you give enough attention to your loved one. You will score points if you are able to show her that you can pay attention to her.

Emotional support - Women and men think differently and women have a completely different idea about emotional support than men. If you try to understand what she’s looking for in terms of emotional support from you, you may be able to get your ex girlfriend back. She obviously won’t be satisfied with just verbal confirmations of emotional support, so buy her a nice gift to show how much you care. This could be a great way to get the ball rolling when you want to get your ex girlfriend back.

Don’t cheat on her - After what you’ve gone through, you may not need reminders about this, but I decided to remind you all the same. Just don’t cheat. If you are sleeping around with other women, then you don’t deserve to get your ex girlfriend back. Even if she’s cheated on you before, don’t pay her back by cheating on her.

Help her keep the place nice - If you are looking to get your ex girlfriend back because you still love her, then time to show her how you can help keep the place clean and nice. Participating in the household chores is important and shows your sense of responsibility towards the relationship and lets her know that you truly care.

If and when you are ready to get your ex girlfriend back, understand that it is not really difficult. It may need you to make some changes in lifestyle and behavior, as you will have to act responsibly and in a mature manner. You need to show her that you love her deeply. By being responsible, caring and loving, you stand a better chance to get your ex girlfriend back.

Tips To Get Your Girlfriend Back!

Sometimes, things conspire to separate you from your girlfriend. However, thinking of her or looking at her picture elicits overwhelming feelings of desire. If you are sure that it is not possible for you to move on and look at someone else, then you will just have to get her back.

Here are some tips to get your girlfriend back. There is no point in making futile attempts at resisting this need, so you should just go ahead and do what needs to be done to achieve that.

Dress well - This may not sound like a big deal, but it is important to dress well. You should make sure you don’t let yourself look as if you are slipping and make the effort to dress well so that you can impress her. Try to choose clothes that reveal a good sense of style. Make sure your hair is not unkempt and wear great smelling cologne. You should be doing all this to look self confident. The idea here is to show your ex what she is missing.

Act normal - Looking and smelling good is all you are going to do. Don’t go behind her to show off. Just act normal as if everything is okay with you. You should look like the person you were before you’ve broken up. The idea here is to not look desperate and this will indeed be a test in patience for you.

Be irresistible - You must seem irresistible to your ex girlfriend. You must know that a way to a girl’s heart is sensibility and charm. It is the same with your girlfriend. She will notice you more when she finds others noticing you. You are trying to get her back to you on her own volition and you can do that without selling yourself.

Be yourself - There is no question this is one of the most important tips to get your girlfriend back. Be yourself. Do not sacrifice yourself in the process of trying to find ways to get back with your ex. Of course, this certainly doesn’t mean that you do not mend your bad ways, as it is important to learn lessons from your break-up and better yourself as much as possible. But you cannot let your ex dictate who you think she wants you to be.

Be her friend - This is the reason one of the most important things is to be her friend in order to get your ex back. Stay close enough but do not force yourself on her. Don’t attempt to push her away. Follow the above tips to get your ex back and see how things are getting better; you are changing, you are impressing her and you can make that all important move to get your girlfriend back when the time is right.

There are many ways to get your girlfriend back; all it takes is lots of effort of the right kind. After all this, it may even so happen that there is no chance of winning your ex back, then all you can do is accept it as part of life and move on. Whatever chances you have to get your girlfriend back, it certainly does not involve showing your desperation. It only involves becoming a better person and letting her want to come back to you.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Techniques That Will Not Help You Get Back With Your Ex

I know, you must be wondering why we are going in reverse gear. But you need to understand what not to do to save a relationship.

Many a time, people who break-up are confused and do things that only make the situation worse than it already is.

If you are suffering from a break-up, you are in pain emotionally and you are perhaps desperate too. This leads your thinking in the wrong direction.

If the goal is to get back with your ex, then I repeat, don’t try the following:

I’ve changed - You plead with your ex saying that you’ve changed. You say you’re never going to look at another man. You promise you’re never going to lie anymore. You say that you’re going to leave your job and stay at home. This kind of reassurance does not work.

I love you - Now you start telling how much you love them. In order to make sure they get the point, you keep repeating yourself, day in and day out. Stop it!

Arguing – You are desperate to get your ex back, and in this frustration you start reasoning, trying to make them think different or act different. Your intention is to make them realize that what they have done is wrong. This is not going to work.

Learn to agree…..

Remember that if you start pointing out mistakes, they end up making more; but if you talk about things they have done right, they make less mistakes.

Let me tell you, this is magic and works wonders.

If your ex says, “We need to move on.”
You will have to say, “I understand.”

You may think that means you are also looking forward to moving on, but what ‘s actually happening is, you’re trying to see what went wrong. Your partner may have broken up because of the disagreements between you both.

If you are the type of person who thinks that just because you are married or in a relationship, your partner should love you, you are so very wrong. Just get rid of that kind of attitude right away. It’s only then, will you be able to see your partner’s true feelings for you.

Usually in a relationship, both partners end up feeling they are correct. Just turn things around and see. Whether it is your ex or your current partner, if you try showing them that you understand their feelings too, you will see the change in their attitude.

Pessimism – Most of us are pessimistic when faced with difficult situations. The minute you leave pessimism behind, you will start seeing things clearly.

Now that you know what you’re not supposed to do, do what you have to and enjoy the magic of making up.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Remembering The Good Old Days You Shared With Your Ex

Here's one of my favorite love songs. It's sure to bring back sweet memories of the love-filled days you shared with your ex.

A VALENTINE

Go, Cupid, and my sweetheart tell
I love her well.
Yes, though she tramples on my heart
And rends that bleeding thing apart;
And though she rolls a scornful eye
On doting me when I go by;
And though she scouts at everything
As tribute unto her I bring—
Apple, banana, caramel—
Haste, Cupid, to my love and tell,
In spite of all, I love her well!

And further say I have a sled
Cushioned in blue and painted red!
The groceryman has promised I
Can "hitch" whenever he goes by—
Go, tell her that, and, furthermore,
Apprise my sweetheart that a score
Of other little girls implore
The boon of riding on that sled
Painted and hitched, as aforesaid;—
And tell her, Cupid, only she
Shall ride upon that sled with me!
Tell her this all, and further tell
I love her well.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Planning To Get Back With Ex?

You would have tried many ways to get back with ex and finally succeeded. Make the most of the second chance. Take it slow when getting back with ex. When you actually went ahead and broke up, there would have been ego bruises and wounded hearts. Although, understandably, you would be thrilled at getting back together, it is important to not act as if nothing ever happened.

In an attempt to make it all fine again and be happy, most couples behave as if nothing has gone wrong. You have to make sure the differences are sorted out first so that they don’t crop up in the future. Breaking up and making up easily, means a continued troubled relationship.

The magic of making up lies in giving it time! Building a renewed relationship takes commitment, understanding and patience. You must give yourself time to heal from the hurt of the break-up and rebuild trust in the relationship.

Consider the reason for breaking up

There is no point in getting back together with ex if things are going to remain the same as before. You must seriously go back in time and look at things that led to this drift. You must make a practical and firm assessment of the whole situation.

Here are a few questions you may want to ask yourself:

· What were the pressures in your relationship?
· What measures are you taking to ensure these pressures don’t build up again?
· In what way were you responsible for the break-up?
· How are you going to avoid the same mistakes?
· Is your partner also working on making the relationship work?
· Have you and your partner discussed about working out things and resolving all the issues?

You will have to sit with your ex and discuss what went wrong and determine how to make your relationship better. If you find it difficult working things out by yourselves, do not hesitate to talk to a counselor. Couple counseling helps you iron out the differences and get back into a happy relationship.

Make sure you take action to better your relationship

After going through the pain of separation once, you sure would not wish to waste the second opportunity you have been given. Now answer these:

· Do you genuinely love and respect your partner?
· What can you do to express your love and show your appreciation in a better manner?
· How can you understand your partner’s needs better?
· Am I spending enough time with my partner?
· How to open up better communication channels with my partner?
· How can we do things together?
· Am I too rigid? If so, how can I be more flexible in my thinking?


Getting back with ex is great and you long for things to get back to how they were in the initial days, but remember that it takes a tremendous effort and patience and more than anything, it takes a deep understanding of your partner’s needs to make this work a second time.

But it will happen as it has to many couples that broke up and got back together – to lead happier lives.

Want To Get Back With Ex On Valentine's Day?

There can be nothing better than getting back together with the love of your life today. That's what Valentine's Day is all about, isn't it?

A day to celebrate love and bring back the lost passion into your life. A day for forgiveness. As long as you remember that nobody is perfect and as long as you love your partner from the depths of your heart, nothing should stop you from doing what it takes to get back with your ex.

Hope all your wishes come true.

Happy Valentine's Day!!

Friday, February 13, 2009

Ways To Get Back With Ex Boyfriend

Your boyfriend and you split up and you realize you’ve been hasty. Many of these decisions are made in anger and haste.

Now you’re trying to find ways to get back with ex. You may have even tried pleading, begging promising to mend your ways and be a better person. You saw him talk to a girl and you tried to break that relationship too. However, what you’re forgetting is that, he can only see with his eyes and he cannot get into your mind. If you seem scheming or childish to him, nothing you say or do is going to be of any use.

First things first! Stop all the weird behavior you may have been displaying since you guys broke up. If your ex is not back with you, then obviously you’re not going about it the right way. If you’ve been following him around everywhere he goes; with his friends or on a date, you are most likely being seen as an unwanted stalker than a person who cares and loves him. For all you know, the very things that you are doing to get him back may be keeping him away. I bet you never looked at it that way!

Okay! Let’s see how you’re going to turn things in your favor…

The next time you come face-to-face with him, wherever it may be, make sure you acknowledge him. You are not going to go to him and demand attention, but you are vey lady-like going to say hello and go about your thing. You can also say that you’ll leave so that he feels more comfortable. Throughout it all, be polite and just leave. Even if he doesn’t come running behind you, your actions and your behavior will get him thinking.

When you want to get back with ex, you must do what isn’t expected of you. If you’ve been calling him a hundred times or even once a day – stop calling. Yes, you can call if you really need something but not to discuss your getting back together. If there is no reason for you to call, then don’t. Do that for a week, then call him once and say, "I've been thinking about you and just called to say." Ask him how he is and a few simple questions.

If your boyfriend sounds suspicious as to why you are calling and thinks you are being artificially nice, don't lose your temper. Convince him that you just called because you were missing him and wanted to hear his voice. Then end the call nicely. This is when he’ll start wondering why you didn’t plead with him as you usually do and he will start thinking what’s going on.

If you don’t feel like calling, you can always mail him a card saying, "Thinking of you!" It’s very important to allow him to make a move. If you want to know ways to get back with an ex boyfriend, the best way is to let him come after you.

Win Back Lost Love

A break-up can be traumatic; especially, if you love the person. People who break-up look at two options – get over the person or win back lost love.

The fact remains that both are not easy. You should sit down and think what it is you want. You should think hard about your relationship before making any hasty decisions. You've suffered enough. Think practically about the reason for breaking up and how things are going to be if you are alone, and how they are going to be if you got back together.

After unbiased assessment of the whole situation, you may end up deciding that the break-up was a good thing.

However, if you decide that there is something in your relationship and you were partly at fault for the situation, and you would love to win back lost love, the first thing to do is offer an apology.
You must remember, if you have done this before and your ex thinks that you are apologizing only to stop a break-up, he or she may not consider it sincere.

If you are sure it has been your fault, there is no harm in apologizing again. The fact is that if you have already separated, your partner will probably understand that you have realized your mistake and you mean it when you apologize. (Make sure you really mean it from your heart).


If it is your partner who was at fault, if you are keen on getting back together, then don’t wait for them to apologize – just forgive them. I know how some things hurt deep and are not easy to forget. For example, if your partner has cheated on you, it is difficult to forget such things. But if you love each other, you must forgive. Forgiving is very hard for some of us, but in many relationships, an apology made all the difference and helped resolve relationship problems.

If you win back lost love, there is every chance that these issues will crop up again down the line, may be about 5 or 6 months or even an year later. This is where problems begin to crop up if you really haven’t forgiven your partner in the first case. This is the reason, I’m stressing on you being totally sincere in what you do. If you don’t find it in your heart to forgive, then don’t rush into getting back – give it time.

On the other hand if you have really forgiven the person, then the past remains the past.

To win back lost love, you must also show your partner the “you” they initially fell in love with, not the person that has been dumped. The reason your partner loved you is because of qualities; such as generosity, thoughtfulness, understanding, caring – certainly not your jealous, hurt, angry self. I know it’s easy to say these things when they are horribly difficult to put into practice. But let me tell you, there are many couples who have overcome the worst of the problems by practicing these things.

Concentrate on being the actual “you” for some time and you will actually start behaving like yourself and your partner will find the old you again.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

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7 Ways of Building Trust in a Relationship

There are ways and there are some more ways of building trust in your relationship. Many a time, what makes a relationship work are not the thoughts that come to us first. If you think that you need to spice things up – you are wrong!

Relationships thrive on predictability and not variety. Look at these seven ways of building trust in your relationship and you will understand how wonderfully they can work:

Predictability – The first and most important. This goes against the most common notion that things need to be “stirred up” to keep the romance alive. Of course, if you are talking about giving a surprise gift or to a new restaurant, it is wonderful. But what we are talking here is about being reliable day in and day out. This is how you build trust in a relationship.

Mean what you say – Ensure your words match what you wish to convey. For example, if you say you are happy but you keep frowning, the message your partner gets is confusing as your body language does not match what you are saying. You have to make your partner trust what you say and this happens only when your words match what you intend to say.

Believe in your partner - You will need to have a belief in the competency of your partner, or else you cannot have trust in your relationship. Trust is based on belief and for you to build trust in your relationship, you will have to believe that your partner is competent.

No secrets – Don’t keep any secrets from your partner. They only end up destroying trust in a relationship. It will be easier to get into the habit of confiding, if you start thinking that your secrets will eventually come out anyway. The problem with keeping secrets is that a lot of energy is needed and you have to actually remember what you said.

Voice your needs – It is crucial to let your partner know what your needs are. You cannot expect her or him to guess what you need. This is something many people tend to do and they are completely wrong. How can you expect your partner to be a mind reader? If you don’t assert what you need, there is the danger of going overboard in the other direction and smother your partner.

Learn to say no – If is a good thing if your partner has the habit of voicing her or his needs. But you don’t have to say “yes” to everything. You cannot gain your partner’s respect if you never say no. Being frank and not subjugating to the other person’s will just to keep them happy, will actually help build trust in your relationship.

Look for growth - Biologically, the clock is ticking anyway. We need to grow in our relationship too. When we plant something, the first thing we do is dig dirt. Yes, if we dig the dirt in our relationship, it does hurt. But, in the long run, we are only preparing our relationship for growth in the future. Be ready to handle all the questions, turmoils, problems in a relationship and don’t shy away from them. These are the fertilizers you need for growth.

Once you make the decision to follow these ways of building trust in a relationship, there is bound to be pain. But, you will realize the extent of happiness that awaits you as you work through all the pain. You will be stronger as a person and you will have the capacity to stabilize your relationship.

How To Tell If You Are In A Troubled Relationship

We all make mistakes and soon enough we start looking for ways to get back with ex. But how does one tell beforehand if we are in a troubled relationship? Understanding this will save you a lot of heartache.

Here are some signs:

· Your partner keeps insulting you in front of others.
· Your partner does express their love in words but never in actions.
· You find your partner trying to control you - reading your personal mail or checking on you by making surprise visits.
· Your partner feels good if you are completely dependent on them.
· You notice that over a period of time you have changed yourself considerably to please your partner.

Such people don’t make you happy when they are around you. What are the reasons for a relationship turning bad? Why would you want to be in a relationship where you feel you are being harmed in every way – both physically and emotionally?

A troubled relationship is like being caught in a vicious cycle. The first phase of the cycle is the honeymoon period, then a blow up, finally reconciliation – then the new cycle begins.

Honeymoon phase is when you meet a new partner. You will not realize that you are in a troubled relationship until and unless you have been sucked in deep into the relationship. This is the stage when it gets very tough to get out of it.

This is precisely the reason why troubled relationships usually turn into troubled homes.

The first step in staying or getting out of troubled relationships is to understand and realize that each one of us, you, me, him and her – we all have choices. You don’t need to suffer by staying in such a relationship.

Once you know that there are choices you can make, the next step is to stand up for yourself. In most troubled relationships, your partner has brainwashed you that whatever is happening in your lives is your fault. Once you start believing this, it is not easy to walk away from the relationship or even try and heal the relationship.

Many people find working in groups for a therapy helps them get out or redefine such relationships.

Here’s the good news………..

Not all troubled relationships end up on a sour note. There are many who repair their troubled relationship and stay in it – happily ever after.

Salvaging a relationship takes a little time, a little space and in some cases, conselling. If both the partners are up to it and go into the “salvage operation” with an open mind, it is possible to renew the relationship and make it healthy.

The choice to make a relationship work is upon the couple. For this to happen, you will have to liberate yourself from the dependency you have formed on your partner. You will have to start to assert what it is you need from your life together.

Don’t try to achieve this by nagging your partner. Just say “I need you to support me,” “ I need your love,” “I need you to be truthful,” or ‘I need you to understand my feelings.”

If things do not change as per your needs, your partner should know that you will walk out.

You must understand that a healthy relationship is like a two-way street, with give and take
from both partners. In a troubled relationship, the street is one-way.

You have the power to change that, but you must make sure you take the power into your hands and do the needful.